When someone asks you a question, please don’t ever answer them by saying “Well, yes and no.” That’s not an answer. The answer is either yes or no, not both. If you can’t muster up the mettle to answer one of the two, please don’t then bookend your witless, cop out response with the classic ”It is what it is,” or some derivation thereof. For example: Me: “Excuse me, but must I attend the meeting as well?” Moron: “Well, yes and no. But whatever. It is what it is.” You see? Dreadful.
The photos today are a smattering of delightful images captured in lovely Paris.
Eva, Paris, France
Have you ever actually been helped by the police? I haven’t. I’ve had items stolen which I reported, and they didn’t help me at all. The absolute only interaction I’ve ever had with the police is when they have been ticketing me. It’s not that I received a ticket recently (which I didn’t), but it just seems to me that the police have at some point in the last 50 or so years transitioned from a force which “Serves and Protects” to a force that essentially tickets people. Honestly, send me an email or comment if you’ve ever actually been helped by the police. I simply haven’t.
Oh, and everyone can stop worrying about the oil spill: President Obama has established an investigative commission. I like where this is heading. Who cares about solving the problem? Not me. Let’s just fine some rich people.
I caught this little gem from our fantabulous local news reporter Kai Porter here in El Paso the other day: “One of the girls, who was in a coma, is able to move her arms and her legs on the left side of her body, but not on the right side of her body.” Good work Kai. And sweet name. By the way, “Kai” is a “man.”
The shot today is of Eva and I in Palestine.
Eva, Paris, France, Rick
Two of my favorite Army sayings: “Water is a crutch.” …and… “If you ain’t cheating, you ain’t trying.”
Why is it that on commercials for alcohol, at the end of the commercial there’s always a disclaimer wherein the manufacturer implores that you “drink responsibly.” Is that some sort of federally regulated disclaimer, akin to the warnings on cigarettes? Is it a bandwagon of responsibility the producers have all jumped on? I don’t know. Either way, it’s ridiculous.
Dennis Miller is incredible. If you don’t listen to him on the AM radio, then you should.
Eva and I are going to Chicago over Memorial Day weekend. Hopefully we can catch a Cubs game.
I’ll update with something of more substance later. Maybe.
Arc de Triumph — Paris
Paris, France
This statue is in the Cielo Vista Mall in El Paso. It’s right between a Cinnabon and Spencer’s. It’s actually quite technologically impressive. The statue is both a beautiful depiction of the first mayor of El Paso from the year 1531, as well as a soda machine. At the base, which you can’t see in this photo, are soda selection buttons and the money inputs. When you select a soda, the open right hand reaches behind the body and emerges with your tasty beverage. It’s quite cool. I don’t fully understand how it works, and I’m not sure I want to. I choose to just let art be art and truthfully share the facts of this magnificent El Paso sculpture/vending machine with my faithful readers.
Also, in the hit song by Jay-Z and Alicia Keys about New York, Keys says “New York, where dreams are made of.” That doesn’t make any sense and it makes me angry every time I hear it. Where dreams are made of? It just made me mad to type it. Now it made me mad to type about typing about it.
Paris, France
I am so sick of commercials and advertisements telling me what I deserve. Today I was asked whether or not I deserve a vacation to Las Vegas to stay at the Treasure Island hotel and whether or not I deserve a new car and car loan. The answer is no. I don’t deserve either of those things. No one deserves any of these things. No one deserves anything just for existing. Not vacations to Vegas, not cars and not health care. I can’t even describe how much I despise hearing about what people deserve. It’s just another way to get more people in this country to spend even more money they don’t have. Much like the government. More and more I find myself siding with Libertarian views. If Libertarian were a viable political party I think the country would be a lot different and a lot better. And a lot more economically sound. Especially since Republicans and Democrats are basically the same now.
The photo today is of the Eiffel Tower in December of 2009. I think the light projecting from the top of the tower is the French National Gaydar. I could be wrong.
The image below shows you where my political views fall. Want to know where you sit? Click the picture to find out for yourself.
Paris, France
Today, as I was driving in the car and listening to AM radio as I oftentimes do, I happened to switch the channel to AM 690 here in El Paso, and low and behold Sean Hannity was on. He was ranting and raving about how the country is going to hell and it’s all President Obama’s fault. I happen to be slightly more moderate than old Hannity and think most things he says are crazy talk. I do happen to agree that the country is on a steady decline and it is due in large part to the ridiculous spending of the Obama administration, but I also think W is as much if not more so at fault. I digress. Hannity was ranting and raving about how Obama is ruining America, and lambasted him for bowing to the dictatorial President of China at the recent nuclear summit. Then he quoted Mahmoud Ahmadinejad to support his point. If you don’t see the lunacy in that, leave my website immediately. Seriously.
The photo today is of Notre Dame at night. And there’s someone hiding at the bottom of the frame. Here’s a hint: she’s cute.
Eva, Paris, France
I’m back in the US and let me tell you: this place is better than Iraq. Eva is still in Iraq and she will be for the next 3 or so weeks. I’m looking forward to her getting home.
Check out my Flickr photostream. Immediately.
The other day, as I walked through the mall from Macy’s to Sears in search of an espresso machine, I walked past a bearded fellow. He was dapper enough; dapper in that he had on a button down shirt which is more than you usually see at the mall. He was an employee. He worked at one of this hallway shops, you know the kind: cell phone accessories, sunglasses, “authentic” gold jewelry, etc. The shop he worked at sold lotions. He was wearing sunglasses inside. And he had an iPad. I thought to myself: “If you work in a mall hallway lotion shop, you probably shouldn’t drop $500 on an iPad.” The relevance of that story? None.
I watched Born Into Brothels today. The whole time I wasn’t thinking “Wow… so moving. So gritty. So disturbing and simultaneously beautiful.” Instead I thought “What the hell is this woman doing in these brothels? Wow is that pointless.” She won an Oscar for it though… guess the joke’s on me.
The photo today is a gargoyle overlooking Paris from Sacre Coeur Basilica.
Paris, France
Did you hear the big news? Al Queda in Yemen claimed responsibility for the failed Christmas Day airline underwear bombing. Wow. Now, I’m no rocket surgeon, but I think claiming responsibility for a failed terrorist attack just might make you look more stupider. Even to other terrorists which is really saying something. The blundering “terrorist” organization also said they are “ready to attack the United States.” Oh no! More failed attacks to come!? How terrifying!! I must respectfully disagree with you Al Queda in Yemen. I think you’re all a bunch of stupid, inept, incompetent dumb dumbs. And you live in Yemen. Lose, Lose.
Speaking of terrorists, have you ever been woken up at 4am by a giant explosion? No? Oh. Me either. *winky emoticon*
The shot today is of the Eiffel Tower from the top of Sacre Coeur. The Eiffel Tower is something Al Queda in Yemen should consider failing at blowing up.
Paris, France
A Sheikh here asked us if he could have our garbage. We said no. It made me feel bad… not that we wouldn’t give our refuse to him, but that he would even ask.
Everybody wants to associate with the special operations crowd: the SEALs, the Special Forces, the CIA. They all have beards and moustaches us “regular folk” aren’t allowed to have.
Kellie Pickler is not nearly as attractive in person as American Idol would have you believe. She is as good of a singer as American Idol would have you believe however.
The photo today is of some roofs across the street from our hotel in Paris. I truly apologize for the infrequent postings. Our internet is abysmal and I’ve gotten exponentially busier over the last couple weeks. I’ll try to post more frequently, but no promises. Don’t give up on me.
Paris, France
If the majority of people committing terrorist acts were white, 20-something males, I wouldn’t get all bent out of shape if I were profiled at the airport. I wouldn’t care because, and this is pretty crazy I admit, but I wouldn’t care because I wouldn’t be doing anything wrong. What a concept. Don’t try to blow up a plane and you won’t get in trouble. Weird. A hypothetical: If I were an American loving American citizen and my name was Mohammed and I had traveled to Saudi Arabia for the Hajj and had to divert through the UAE, I don’t think I’d mind if the customs agent examining my Passport upon my return to Dulles directed me to the secondary screening line. Why? Because I’m not a moron. Arabs and muslims are committing virtually ALL of the terrorist acts in the world. The answer? Pay a little bit more attention to them. God forbid we offend someone.
I think I just witnessed one of the first signs of the apocalypse: Bill O’Reilly referred his viewers to Sarah Palin’s Facebook page to check her status. Yikes.
The photo today is of the Notre Dame Cathedral in Paris.
Paris, France
Witness ye the first officially approved and posted photos from the much anticipated R&R trip to Europe. The first photo is of the Parisian skyline taken from the top of the Sacre Coeur Cathedral in Montmartre, Paris. “What does Sacre Coeur look like?” you may ask. Well, click the handily provided link above or wait for future postings with photos of the place. Montmartre is essentially a borough of Paris and is the highest point of the city. It’s where the Moulin Rouge is located as well. The Moulin Rouge was basically a petri dish for artists including Toulouse-Lautrec, a world renowned sickly midget who hung out at what essentially amounts to a strip club not for cheap thrills but rather for “inspiration.” You may remember him as portrayed by John Leguizamo in the 2001 Baz Luhrmann film.
The second photo is of Ghent, a small town in Belgium just outside of Brussels. We mistakenly went to Brussels first, not adhering to a major tenet of our travel policy: “In most, though not all circumstances, major cities are just like all other major cities and should therefore be avoided whilst traveling, in lieu of other nearby, more quaint towns/villages.” Our policy is strict. And wordy. Another rule for example: ”If George is not on the trip, and there is no flight to make, you shall not under any circumstances awaken before 9ish.” We were not surprised then to find that Brussels, while being decidedly difficult to navigate in a car, was more or less like a lot of other big cities but with cobblestones. We stayed one night, went to see the peeing baby, and took off for Ghent. It was a solid play. Ghent was incredible, as I think is evident from the provided photo.
All in all the trip was absolutely spectacular. My Mom and Dad as well as Mimi and Denny (for those not in the know: my Grandparents) met us in France and we did Paris for a few days then went to Normandy to see the beaches. We took the Battlebus tour, headed by the magnificent Dale Booth. If you go to Normandy, which I highly recommend, you will be doing yourself a disservice by not taking the Battlebus tour. It was easily one of the highlights of our two week European vacation. After Normandy our family took off for the colonies and Eva and I headed to Belgium. R&R simply could not have been better. More to follow in the coming days and weeks.
I took 640 pictures so there are plenty to choose from.
Ghent, Belgium, Paris, France
Literally. And it’s quite cool. So was Ghent. Pictures to follow en masse when I’m able to process them to the point that I do them justice.
I’ve decided to update the ol’ site to keep it rolling until I have more interest in my website than I have in doing things in real life. In layman’s terms: Iraq. Once we get back to Iraq we’ll be short on time until we go back to the colonies however. Something I thought the other day that I couldn’t believe I was thinking: “I’m really looking forward to getting back to El Paso.” I think that’s the fifth or sixth sign of the apocalypse.
Paris, France
Eva and I are on leave in Paris right now. It’s spectacular. To say Paris is better than Iraq is to say lamps are better than scuba diving. They cannot be compared.
This guy is “guarding” the Mona Lisa. The only real rule I saw clearly posted throughout the Louvre was that flash pictures were not allowed. I’ve never seen so many flashes… he didn’t say a word. I thought Nicole Richie was there. She wasn’t. All the fuss was over the little painting by some guy named Leonardo.
Paris, France