The source code looks like it could potentially be the worst movie ever made.
Eva shot a 98 on a Tom Fazio course today. That’s pretty damn good. I shot a 91. Not so great. But that 91 bumped a 93 off my handicap so I’m at an 18.3 now. If you know what that all means then you know it’s not too terrible and not too great. I’m working on it.
We’re leaving for Georgia tomorrow. We’re going through Big Spring, TX then Shreveport, LA then Auburn, AL. It’s a four day trip in all. Should be a blast! Once we get to Augusta we’re going to find a house and learn our way around town. I’m heading to Hilton Head on Friday morning to help Mimi and Denny with some stuff and will hopefully be able to squeeze a round or two of golf in as well.
The photo today is of Eva’s current baby bump situation. The little guy is coming along nicely.
Offers are not exclusive if you see them on a commercial.
Turning tricks as a prostitute is not “hustling.” Speaking of prostitutes: why is the refined method of discussing someone picking up hookers referred to as “associating with prostitutes?” Let’s call a spade a spade.
If a cop tells you to “stop resisting” it means you’re going to get beaten up.
I can’t believe Randy is now the voice of reason. If you don’t know what that means, then don’t worry about it. If you do know what it means, it also means you can’t make fun of me for it. Joseph Heller could though.
90% of “romantic” events in movies would be absolutely unbearable in real life.
There are no worse commercials than the 5 Hour Energy commercials.
I hate commercials where someone says “Please welcome…” and then they introduce somebody with some sort of expertise or credibility. Nobody can welcome them. They’re on a closed set talking to a camera.
I hate people backing the public workers unions in WI. Is it just me, or is the phrase “public worker union” paramount to “awesome ballet” or “enjoyable root canal”? You work for the state. If you want to have a say in your pay and benefits, work in the private sector.
Even Rae Dawn Chong knows that flight attendants can’t fly planes.
I hate missing two foot putts.
If you have Netflix, and you liked Ali G, then you need to watch “Dog Bites Man” on Watch Instantly. Warning: it can get quite awkward because the only people that know it’s fake are the four main actors. It is chock full of hilarity.
That’s it for now. I’ll complain about and laud more things later. I know you can’t wait.
Below is a piece of clothing which, as of yet, fits nobody in the house.
That’s right my friends. In early July of this year, the Cook family will welcome a bouncing baby boy into the family. In celebration of this revelation, I’m posting an ultrasound photo of the foot he will use to dominate the world of soccer, as well as one of his face and profile and brain which he will also probably use in some capacity.
LeBron is so good it’s almost awkward to watch. It’s almost as awkward to type his first name.
I’m bringing back some highlights of the Google Instant Search results. I type in whatever is before the colon and whatever is after the colon automatically pops up. It usually represents what is most commonly searched for using that initial phrase.
I really think I : hate you
Mormons don’t know : how magnets work
LeBron James is : gay
Pregnant women and : cats
Everyone I know is an : alcoholic
Marijuana is : good for you
Criminals are : a superstitious and cowardly lot
White people : stole my car
Black people aren’t : scared of Halloween
10 reasons : to date a basketball player
Quickest way : to lost weight
Slowest way : to die
Wasn’t that fun? I know!
Take a look at this. Go Steelers.
I wonder what people in Ethiopia think about the show The Biggest Loser? Trick question. They don’t have TV.
The Seahawks won the NFC West are going to the playoffs with a losing record. I think that pretty well closes the case of the AFC versus the NFC.
The pictures today are of Sydney during the Great El Paso Snow Storm of 2010. He loved the snow. There was about a half inch on the ground. It’s gone now.
“I do think at some point you’ve made enough money.” – Barrack Obama
“From each according to his abilities, to each according to his needs.” – Karl Marx
Don’t you think those quotes seem strangely complimentary? I do. That’s why I posted them here. Idiot.
Have you seen the “Pure Protein” commercial where the lady is running and a hot dog vendor and a pretzel vendor try selling her their wares as she runs by? It’s the most ridiculous thing I’ve ever seen. Well maybe not ever, but it’s pretty ridiculous. Watch it here… the attempted sales happen in the first 8 second. What kills me is that someone wrote that, pitched it, and the powers that be thought: ”I like it. It makes sense. Make it happen.” That commercial makes me less likely to buy “Pure Protein.”
The photo today was taken off Trans-Mountain Highway in El Paso. I took it immediately following La Vina Wine Fest.
This is a close-up (macro) shot of a very detailed chess piece. One of the knights in fact. It’s from a chess set I honed from a single piece of Indian green marble. Including the board. Bobby Fischer offered me $10k for it in 2006. I punched him in the stomach, took his wallet, and told him to get his socialist traitor ass back to Iceland. He complied. Ironically my knight looks like a giant statue that could be, say, near the entrance of the El Paso airport, and possibly be named ‘The Equestrian,’ and, I don’t know, maybe dedicated in 2007, and, who knows, possibly sculpted by John Sherrill Houser. It certainly looks like that. But it’s not.
I’m sitting on the 25th floor of a condo building on the north side of Chicago. I’ve taken a gajillion pictures here, but I didn’t bring my computer so I can’t open my Raw files to post any of the shots. In good time my friends, in good time. Due time? Damn, in due time sounds better. Maybe I should have written: “In due time my friends, in due time.” Maybe instead of writing what I should have written I should have just deleted what I wrote and replaced it with what I suggested should have been written in its place. Damnit. I’ll never get this right.
We went to Second City last night. Very funny. The best skit went something like this:
Mother: “So you mean, he’ll like to draw and paint and sculpt?”
Doctor: “Oh goodness, did I say artistic?”
Eva and I are going to Vegas with Arch and Tiff this coming up weekend. We’re balling at the Venetian. Arch made the reservations and they said “You’re all confirmed Mr. Archuleta, you will be balling with us on the nights of the 27th, 28th, and 29th.” He clarified and they confirmed our official status as “balling.” Very strange; I’ll let you know if it’s true.
This is a shot taken from the front porch of our apartment in El Paso.
Granted, I’m biased. But honestly… admit it… not only was it easily one of the, if not THE, greatest Super Bowls of all time, but it was quite possibly one of the greatest football games of all time. Again, full disclosure, I might be somewhat slightly sort of biased. But seriously. Wow.
Oh and the Steelers now have more Super Bowl victories than any other team in the history of the NFL. Ever. Since it was invented. Which was so long ago that all the pictures and film from back then are in black and white. And there was no internet. Or cell phones. Yea… crazy.
Reach for the sky.
Oh this? Yea, it’s my gun. A license? Sure I’ve got a license; it’s signed by 39 dudes and it’s called the Constitution. My feelings on what? Speak up Mrs. Pelosi I can’t hear you very well. Oh, my feelings on gun control. Well I think if you control guns then the law abiding citizens like me will be controlled quite well. However, the people you are trying to keep from committing crimes with said gun control will just be emboldened by the fact that their potential victims are no longer even potentially armed. I mean, these people already disobey laws–what makes you think new laws will change anything? Wait, wait, what? Shove it where? Why would I do that with your shoe? That’s gross. You’re gross. What are you even doing in my living room?