It’s been quite a while since I’ve updated this thing. For those of you that still come to the site, thanks. I’ll try and update more frequently but I’ve been really, really busy. For those of you that don’t know, I’m currently the S3 for my unit. For those of you that don’t know what that means, suffice it to say that it keeps me quite busy. When I get done with work, I don’t feel like doing anything except hanging out with Eva and Sydney and going to sleep.
This last weekend, Eva and I went to Nashville for my friend Mike’s wedding. It was an absolute blast. We saw a lot of our friends from school who, for the most part, we haven’t seen in 4+ years. That first night at dinner it was as if we’d all seen each other the week before. Everything was the same and it was great. We snagged a lot of great pictures at the reception and I’ll post some of them here after we filter through them in the next couple days.
In the mean time, here are some more shots from the Bahamas.
Abaco, Bahamas, Erin, Eva, George, Laura
When someone asks you a question, please don’t ever answer them by saying “Well, yes and no.” That’s not an answer. The answer is either yes or no, not both. If you can’t muster up the mettle to answer one of the two, please don’t then bookend your witless, cop out response with the classic ”It is what it is,” or some derivation thereof. For example: Me: “Excuse me, but must I attend the meeting as well?” Moron: “Well, yes and no. But whatever. It is what it is.” You see? Dreadful.
The photos today are a smattering of delightful images captured in lovely Paris.
Eva, Paris, France
Newt Gingrich made a great point earlier this week: he first mentioned how the U.S. constantly makes sure we don’t offend any other nation with our stances and policies. That much is a given. He continued on, however, to make a point which I had never considered… that being that we never concern ourselves with why the rest of the world couldn’t care less if it offends us. We’re so wrapped up in ensuring we don’t do or say anything that may rub any other nation the wrong way that we fail to consider that we’re the only ones that act that way. Since when did national self interest become something about which we had to defend ourselves?
Two photos this week. One is a super duper processed shot of my dad and Eva in my parent’s condo in Chicago. It’s HDR and textured. The other is of the cobblestone road leading up to the porch of my parent’s first house in Aspinwall, a suburb of Pittsburgh.
Chicago, IL, Eva, HDR, Pittsburgh, PA
Cancel Christmas. The world is officially ending. Two days ago I heard a correspondent on the Today Show refer to the cast of Jersey Shore as “American Icons.” I’ve never seen the show. In the Today Show’s attempt to certify their assertion, they showed clips of the show and interviewed the cast. It was the most embarrassing display of American humanity imaginable. These people are the epitome of untalented, arguably bordering on mentally disabled and, though the least substantive, given the fact that it’s a television show, unattractive to boot. I would rather break my pinkie fingers than watch that show. And I’d rather move to Juarez than live in a place where these parasites are considered icons.
Speaking of embarrassing. It would seem as though the two biggest news stories this last week were Lindsay Lohan going to jail and Chelsea Clinton getting married. I couldn’t care less about Lindsay Lohan. It would be ironic if Ms. Clinton’s husband-to-be has braces; that’s the extent of my interest.
The shot today is of the point just down the road from where we stay in the Bahamas. I took it at about 11pm or so. That bright light is the moon. Look closely and you can see the stars.
Abaco, Bahamas
I’ve been unbelievably busy the last 3 or so weeks. I have a new job which is above my pay grade (quite literally) and Sydney has been keeping us up at night. Lots of work with little sleep does not a good combination make. It’s getting better though.
The shots today are pretty random. They have been sitting in my “Future Posts” folder for an indeterminate amount of time and I finally decided to post them all at once to get them out of that folder. Could I have just removed them at any time? Of course. But they were in the “Future Posts” folder. So I had to post them. Obviously.
Abstract, Chicago, IL
“I’ve always been self-sufficient. My house was close to foreclosure.”
I heard that exact phrase, in that order, on a bankruptcy attorney’s commercial here in El Paso. The beauty of that sentence is that the attorney who made the commercial doesn’t see how ridiculous that is. Either that or he knows that he is dealing with such dim-witted dregs that he knows they’ll hear that and be able to relate. Unreal.
I apologize for the lack of updates this week; Eva and I had a little addition to our family arrive this week on a plane from Phoenix. His name’s Sydney. He’s a Schnoodle: half Schnauzer, half Poodle.
Sydney
I’ve written before about how credit scores are crap and how the American fixation on credit scores is a symptom of our infatuation with credit based purchases and our proclivity to buy that which we can’t afford and to “need” something we want immediately. However, I recently learned something even more telling about the disgusting American credit craze. I learned what the FICO score (the fabled “credit score”) is actually comprised of. 35% of the score is based on your payment history, or the timeliness of your active debt ”reduction” such as mortgage, car and credit card payments. 30% of the score is based on the actual amount of debt you possess. 15% of the score is based on how far back your credit history goes, or rather how far back you’ve possessed debt. 10% of the score is based on what kind of debt you have and the final 10% is based on how many recent new credit accounts you have established. What does this all mean? It means to have a GREAT credit score, you need to have a lot of different kinds of debt. If you have no credit card debt, a paid off mortgage, no car payments and a million dollars liquid in savings you’ll have a TERRIBLE credit score. Also, if you don’t interact with debt for 2 years your credit score goes to zero. What kind of ridiculous system is that? Oh that’s right, it’s an American system.
The photo today is one of my favorite shots from our recent trip to the Bahamas. It’s of a signpost outside the restaurant Cracker P’s which shows how far you are from a bunch of different cities around the world.
Abaco, Bahamas
I learned on a BP commercial that there are 900 people answering phones and filing claims on behalf of people financially impacted by their oil disaster in the Gulf Region. It would appear to me that BP is the only group in this country that has actually created any jobs.
Why is it that I walk up to a urinal full of urine in a public bathroom, and as soon as I stop in front it flushes, thereby spraying pee/water mist toward/on me? And why am I always wearing flip flops?
Eva and I just returned from an incredible vacation in the Bahamas. We were there for my grandparent’s 50th wedding anniversary. Our entire family on my mom’s side was there: 24 people in total. It was a blast. I didn’t have one drink on the 4th of July because I needed to detox from a week with my family. In celebration of this event, I’m posting a standard Bahamian photo. This was taken from a restaurant named Cracker P’s where we had lunch.
Abaco, Bahamas
When Ed Hardy jumps the shark, the shark will be wearing a sweet Ed Hardy screen print t-shirt and drinking some Hypnotiq out of an Ed Hardy tumbler. Which I’ve actually seen.
Abstract
Fact: Patton Oswalt is not funny, but Daniel Tosh is hysterical.
Irony: Abraham Lincoln started the Secret Service.
Observation: The only way I could care less about the NBA would be to not know it even exists.
Fact: A common misconception is that a teardrop tattoo means you’ve killed someone. What it really means is that you’re a dumbshit. Or unemployed. Or both.
Observation: Febreze is quickly becoming the cranberry of cleaning products: it’s in everything now.
The photo today is of an old Korean woman at the top of the Seoul tower looking longingly in the direction of Chicago.
Seoul, Korea
I wish I knew where to attribute this, but I heard it from someone recently , I think in Chicago, when Eva and I went there for Memorial Day… I’ve heard that people that speak three languages are trilingual, people that speak two languages are bilingual and people that speak one language are American. I always thought this was a fairly solid illustration of our culture of superiority. It’s always embarrassing to travel to Europe and default speak English when almost everyone there speaks their own language, English and generally a couple other languages as well. It makes us seem like uncultured dregs. What we fail to realize as we default accept the fact that we are culturally inferior to the Europeans is that when you live in Europe, if you drive two hours in any direction you have to speak a different language. If you live in France and travel anywhere outside of the country, you will need to speak English because it’s the great equalizer. In America on the other hand, you can basically travel 12+ hours in any direction regardless of where you live and everyone will still speak English. Couple that with the fact that English is the international language of business and the fact that the US dollar is currently the global standard for currency, and it seems more and more like we should only speak English. Plus we’re better than everyone else in the world. So there’s that too.
The photo today is one which I took out a plane window. Hover your mouse over the photo and you’ll see what I called it to trick creepy Googlers. Next time I’ll let you know how many of said creepy Googlers happened upon my website via that particular search phrase. So look forward to that!
Abstract
Talking about our soon to arrive puppy:
Rick – “I really don’t care what color he is… black, brown… doesn’t matter to me, as long as he’s healthy. Kind of like a baby.”
Eva – “What if I had a brown baby but it was healthy?”
Such a comedian. Excuse me. Comedienne.
The picture today is of the Washington Monument and the front of the mess hall at West Point.
HDR, West Point, NY
Obama said BP should pay its employees for not working. He would say that. He infuriates me beyond words. I’m glad the oil spill happened on his watch. He’s the worst.
On a lighter note, a 15 year old Mexican boy was shot and killed here on the El Paso-Mexican border a few days ago. He and others had surrounded a border patrol agent that was responding to a human trafficking report and were throwing fist sized rocks at him. So, he shot one of them and the rock throwing pretty much subsided. Imagine that. Of course people are bitching. These same people are, however, generally uneducated, unemployed, don’t pay taxes and are therefore just as inconsequential as the dead rock hurler. Fitting.
The shot today is of the Pittsburgh skyline from right near Heinz Field.
Pittsburgh, PA
Yesterday on the 10 o’clock news, my favorite local reporter, the distinguished and ambiguously gay Kai Porter, highlighted a GED graduation ceremony here in El Paso. El Paso never ceases to amaze me.
The shot today is from the side of the tracks at the Bosan Train Station outside of Camp Casey in Korea.
Point & Shoot, Seoul, Korea
I caught this extremely extreme action shot while snapping pictures in Korea at our unit’s “Organization Day.” The people that put an “Organization Day” on call them “Morale Building” and “Fun.” Those of us forced to attend these events prefer to call them ”Gay” and “Beat.”
Seoul, Korea
Speaking of Kanye West… do you think he’ll stand up at the Grammys and declare that President Obama doesn’t care about white shrimp fishermen? Doubt it.
The shot this fabulous day is of train tracks through a fence on a bridge in Seoul.
HDR, Seoul, Korea
Chris Christie, the Governor of New Jersey, was talking to a group of teachers the other day. One of them stood up, clutched the mic, and began lambasting Mr. Christie because she, as a teacher, is not compensated for her education or experience. Mr. Christie’s response? “Well, you know then that you don’t have to do it.” What a concept. Quit complaining to the public administration about your circumstances. If you don’t like where you’re at, do something else. Well done Mr. Christie, and well said. Don’t get me wrong, teachers are great and necessary, but the fact remains that if you don’t like your professional compensation, you can very simply go and do something else. Don’t bitch about what you should be getting–go out and get it.
Conservatives are for small government, limited government interaction, minimal regulation, and are proponents of private industry. Ask a conservative which can do better, the federal government or a private corporation, and ten times out of ten they will reply “the private corporation.” So can someone then explain to me why it is that those on the right are chastising the Obama administration for their lack of action insofar as rectifying the gulf oil spill disaster? It would seem to me that they should exalt in the lack of government interference and the fact that BP, a private organization, is spearheading the solution and subsequent cleanup. Nope. They’re hammering Obama for not making the federal government do more. It’s just partisan bickering and hypocrisy. Don’t get me wrong here: I dislike Obama as much as the next guy. Assuming of course that said guy isn’t on welfare and values his individual wealth and thinks he should provide for himself as opposed to the government providing for him. (And in this country, those are all massively huge assumptions.) But honestly, let’s either concern ourselves with issues or just leave it alone. Partisan banter determines/solves/improves nothing.
The shot today is of a wonderful little highway sign on the east side of Korea. I literally don’t want to go to any of the places this road takes you. It’s not in Seoul but I’ve categorized it as Seoul because it’s easier. Sue me.
Seoul, Korea
Let me get this out first: I hate her. Now… Let me tell you about the woman at GameStop. I walked into the GameStop here on Ft. Bliss in search of a Guitar Hero guitar. (That’s as much as I’m going to go into that.) As soon as I walked into the store, the first thing I hear, overpowering all other noises and even most movement, was the terribly shrill and ridiculously loud voice of a woman. “Johnathan. Johnathan. Johnathan. What game do you want to reserve next?” She already had three PlayStation 3 games in hand at the register, (that’s about $180 by the way), and she was asking her son what game he wanted to reserve next. In other words, she was asking her out of shape little pockmarked spawn what game he wanted her to reserve so the minute it’s released they can pull their greasy hands out of their family size KFC chicken bucket and head on over to GameStop to buy it immediately. That was enough to make me want to choke slam her. Until she said this to the guy working at GameStop: “Do you know why we’re here? Because Johnathan just tested into the gifted and talented program.” Like the high school dropout making $8.50 an hour selling Splinter Cell spin-offs to up and coming GameStop employees gave a shit. Then Johnathan chimed in: “Mom. Mom. Mom. It’s just so hard; I don’t know what to reserve next.” At this point I’m wondering why he doesn’t just use his superior intellect, logic, and as of yet unseen talents to determine what game he should get next. Instead, his horrible mother answers, “Oh Johnathan, come on, you know you’re going to get them both.” Mind you, the entire time this troglodyte was yapping about video games and her “gifted and talented” kids, she was at a constant decibel level of about 130. I really wanted to punch her in the face. Instead I just stood there angry and sweating, because that’s what adults do.
But enough anger. The shot today is of the lovely Chicago skyline, posted in celebratory anticipation of our trip to Chicago tomorrow. I snapped it about two years ago from, not surprisingly, a plane on approach into O’Hare.
Chicago, IL
Memorial Day is for remembering America’s war dead. Generally Presidents spend the day at Arlington. Not Obama. He’s going to Chicago. Probably to pal around with Bill Ayers. Also, Obama hasn’t held a press conference in 11 months. That must be the transparency he touted to get elected.
Eva and I are heading to Chicago this weekend. Cookout with family and friends, Cubs game, Chicago… it’s going to be magnificent.
The picture today is of a handy little sign I discovered in our Brigade Headquarters conference room.
Cell Phone Shots
Have you ever actually been helped by the police? I haven’t. I’ve had items stolen which I reported, and they didn’t help me at all. The absolute only interaction I’ve ever had with the police is when they have been ticketing me. It’s not that I received a ticket recently (which I didn’t), but it just seems to me that the police have at some point in the last 50 or so years transitioned from a force which “Serves and Protects” to a force that essentially tickets people. Honestly, send me an email or comment if you’ve ever actually been helped by the police. I simply haven’t.
Oh, and everyone can stop worrying about the oil spill: President Obama has established an investigative commission. I like where this is heading. Who cares about solving the problem? Not me. Let’s just fine some rich people.
I caught this little gem from our fantabulous local news reporter Kai Porter here in El Paso the other day: “One of the girls, who was in a coma, is able to move her arms and her legs on the left side of her body, but not on the right side of her body.” Good work Kai. And sweet name. By the way, “Kai” is a “man.”
The shot today is of Eva and I in Palestine.
Eva, Paris, France, Rick